On the rocks alert: Marriages explode!

Publication: Star
Date: 19 July 2011

The Star has stories of three celebrity marriages in trouble taking up most of the cover this week. Here are the headlines.


Katy Perry pain: Living apart from Russell After Only 8 months


Shock for Demi Moore: Ashton's Night With Nude Model


Ben Affleck Busted: His Boozing, Lies & Gambling - Jen Garner's Fury

Welcome to gossip hell 2011, Jen Garner! This is the first mention of her in a year and a half, and the first mention of Ben Affleck in 2011.

Fussin' and Feudin' Alert™: Ashton Kutcher vs. Charlie Sheen.

Publications: In Touch, Us Weekly
Date: 30 May 2011

The producers of Two and a Half Men have announced the show will continue with Ashton Kutcher replacing Charlie Sheen. As you can imagine, Charlie took this news with all the level headed goodwill towards his fellow human beings he has always shown in every situation, public and private. Here are the headlines.

• In Touch: Charlie threatens Ashton!
• Us Weekly: Ashton vs. Charlie

Doesn't fame sound like the funnest thing ever? Aren't we lucky to live in a society where fame is only awarded to the best humanity can offer?

Those questions are rhetorical. You don't have to answer, but you can if you want.